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Sunday, March 22, 2009

Gems from the Pulpit...

I was reminded today by a speaker in church that WAY back in the day when the grass was still green and all that jazz there was this book... a book to remind you of many ways to get along well in life...

Yeah - that's the one - with such gems as "Learn to identify local wildflowers" & "when playing games with children, let them win"

Back in my late teens it seems that these books were flying off the shelves...  1/2 of them probably sold to the Young Women Leaders at churches around the country.  I have one...

...unfortunately for my children I also have the "other" book:

Given to me by a good friend while I was in the hospital recuperating from abdominal surgery...  until my nurse told me that if it hurts when I laugh maybe I should put the book away.

Just for fun - I looked up #44 in both books (because maybe THAT's what the dream was about?)

Instruction Book:  Show respect for teachers
Destruction Book: Mumble

My kids immediately came home from church to read a few pages of these gems...  so while the Instruction Books (two different volumes) sit here on my computer desk whilst I blog the kids are over there guffawing over suggestions to "comment on weight gain in others", " see what it takes to get the lifeguard to blow the whistle" and reminders that "stopping for red lights after midnight is a waste of time"... but no worries, none of them drive yet - and besides, the books says to "tuck a $20 in your billfold so the trooper will take the hint"

Hmmmm...  I wonder why my kids turned out like this?

When ManOfTheHouse and I got married we combined our CD collections and had a few duplicates... we figured that meant we were truly compatible - and traded them in for some newer ones at GreyWhale CD exchange...  but then we realized we had another Cosmic Universe Sign of Compatibility:  Q had this book:
and I had another about a Dead Frog (also a gift from that same friend - different hospital stay) Wish I could have found a picture - mine is long lost and I can't seem to locate a copy anywhere... those demented children of mine who inherited their humor from unknown sources would certainly appreciate it!

9 comments:

April said...

There is nothing like humor to keep a family united. I love it! It also gives you a better perspective on life. If you have a sense of humor you don't take yourself too seriously and so when things don't go as planned you can easily go to plan B, or plan C, or ....ohhh, you get the idea! I am on plan X I think! hahaha!!

Becca said...

I remember all those little gift books! We got one when we were married ... something about 100 nice things to say to your spouse. A lot of them rang true!

just the five of us said...

Funny, the books look familiar, but I must have left their wisdom on the shelf of my mom's house:D

Barbaloot said...

Those look like great books. But I fully do not agree with letting kids win in games. My dad never did...which could explain the intense joy we get every time we beat him in a game:)

Becky said...

I am obviously missing out on some very important knowledge!! Nobody ever told me about the "other" book. Bless you!

Think my library has it?

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I totally had that first book! But never heard of the others...should I be running to my local store or looking for it at Amazon? :)

Ash said...

I loved that book - my mother tucked it in my college boxes for me to discover when I unpacked. Some good info. I need the Destruction one.

Now I just have to find my Snigglet books - my first blush of true love for words.

Megz said...

Looks like the kind of books that belong in the bathroom.

MakingChanges said...

I need a friend like that who will give me really groovy books to help recover from hospital stays or regular life insanity.