Tuesday, June 23, 2009

more library wisdom...

it's amazing what tidbits of wonder can be crammed into a two page newsletter stapled together by librarians!

Since we spent the weekend praising the husbands and putting them up on pedestals - if you're like me it's about time that the pedestal was stored back in the garage... but it will probably sit there for another week until I can convince M.O.T.H. to haul it out of here...

while it's still out, and before we forget WHY we were being all sweet and lovey dovey in the first place - let me present the library's version of...

Man Rules

#1 - Men are NOT mind readers.

#1 - Sunday sports - it's like the full moon or the changing of tides... let it be.

#1 - Crying is blackmail.

#1 - Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one. Subtle hints do not work! Just say it!

#1 - "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

#1 - If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant it the other way.

#1 - Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

#1 - Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

#1 - Men see in only 16 colors. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what "mauve" is.

#1 - Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after seven days.

#1 - When we go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... really!

I think if I can keep these in mind M.O.T.H. and I should be getting along fine indefinitely :) I might mention however in regards to #1 (the second one) that I'm thrilled that my Sundays rarely involve sports!



and... as a final word of wisdom - from Garry Shandling... "They should put expiration dates on clothes so we men will know when they go out of style."

(and yes... for those of you who know how crazy our life has been lately - I will EVENTUALLY get around to blogging about something besides the library newsletter... eventually!)

11 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Love it! And they also have a broken internal thermostat. They are always hot!

T said...

thus the snuggie... :)

Terresa said...

I relate to the Christopher Columbus statement---too many times this has happened to me with my dad, brothers, husband and probably someday, my 2 sons. Ahhh, men.

PS: Not sure what the Library newsletter is, but I'm a Librarian, and we rock.

T said...

seriously - when I grow up I want to be a librarian... I've read 1/2 the books there and I LOVE to talk about books :) (and I already keep my books at home in library order... but don't tell anyone, they might think me geeky!)

Malinda said...

I am with you, my Sundays rarely have any sports on either and I am so happy about that. My husband doesn't really like watching sports, unless it is my son Ethan playing. I also wanted to thank-you for commenting on my blog, it really made my day.

Alicia said...

Thankfully my man's not much of a sports guy!! But I loved your post! Very funny....and accurate!

Barbaloot said...

Love that all of them are #1:) And also, what is mauve? I have no idea either.

T said...

Barb - I "think" mauve is some pinky purply color that I wouldn't allow in my house... I love that you didn't know!!!

and alicia - I just love your little mustachioed cheese wedge, have I mentioned that yet? It makes me smile to see it there every time you comment!

just the five of us said...

Love the blog! On the radio the other day they were discussing men's sandals, the only cool thing for men to wear on their feet is flip flops or tennis shoes, Sandals say GEEK! Now Mike won't wear sandals:D

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

I am dying to hear the rest of the story. How long will the suspense last? Will the details include you being employed? Just wondering.

Firefly said...

It took me 18 years to learn not to talk to Slim until the commercials. Now that I figured it out, the last 3 years have been bliss. lol.