(Today is my guest post at Chocolate on my Cranium - which might make you still like me if I'm slamming your favorite book today...)
I read a lot of books...
Don't act shocked...
I mean... seriously - I put up a bunch of reviews over at that book blog I can't believe you don't all spend more time at!
Sometimes there's a book that just blows me away with its insight and tender moments.
SOOOOO did not do that!!!
Sorry, I know I'm begging for hate mail, but this book makes me want to punch orphans.
Okay, maybe it's not the book... maybe it's the people that read portions of this book from the pulpit in church.
No, I'm not kidding.
We both wish I were, I know...
Question: Have you ever read anything ELSE by Robert Munsch? He's a hilarious author who writes funny stories about two kids who spend hours and days making fried chicken until they've perfected the recipe (and nearly burned off their mouths in the process). He writes about a young couple who leaves their barely old enough to see over the edge of the tub daughter at home while they run off to the hospital to have a baby and end up at the zoo instead and mistakenly bring home an alligator.
Do you think he expects us to take him seriously?
So why, for the love of all that is good and holy, when he writes about a mother who is guilty of Breaking & Entering in order to lift her grown man of a son onto her lap and sing a song am I the only one stifling my laughter?
No, I actually don't find it touching...
Sorry, I'm cynical like that...
(I just re-read the end of the book after scoffing at it for the past 15 years... the LAST page is touching, but by then I'm too disturbed by the mental instability of the mother to shed a tear....)
My heart is NOT made of stone, stop saying that!
I read a book once about a grandpa who pushed his grandson in the stroller and helped him learn to walk and then their roles were reversed later in life... that was WAY sweet and I was mortified when I read it to a classroom full of children and ended up bawling... see, if my heart had been made of rock I would have made it through that day without mascara streaks on my face. (Can't remember the title to save my life, sorry)
I read another book about a baby who turned into all sorts of horrendous creatures before finally becoming human again... and while that sounds just strange - that brought a tear or two (or twelve, I didn't count) because I have teenagers... and trust me... that book was as close to real life as it could get while being about a transmogrifying toddler. (Zagazoo)
See, totally human heart... but seriously, I'm considering making it a condition of my living will that my children not be allowed to pick me up and rock me in the rocker... because THAT is perhaps the most disturbing image of all.