Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Making light of a stressful situation...

First off, I have to admit to the world that my "stressful situation" doesn't hold a candle to some people's - and I'm sure that somebody will read this and say "what... THAT stresses her out, I'd like to see her handle MY life"   Well go right ahead...  I know that in comparison my life is peachy keen and since there was no loss of life (well, lives of human beings) and relatively little loss of comfort I will just get over this... but since this is MY blog and because there was SOME loss of sanity - I'm putting this into my stressful category and that's that.

You see, on the heels of my Monday from Albuquerque (Albuquerque being next door to Hades) I got the a Tuesday I would like to forever wipe from memory!  I have two beautiful daughters (and 3 handsome sons who don't figure into this story much) and 4 yr old M and I spent the morning volunteering in 6 yr old H's 1st grade class...  So far, no stress... life is good - I can cope, really I can!  Then... as M is sitting on my lap I see some movement from the corner of my eye... unfortunately the corner of my eye is focused on her SCALP!  There is a little teensy but definitely disgusting little bug in her HAIR... So I run screaming from the school (well, not really) - straight to the store to purchase every conceivable lice treatment in the world... or at least on their shelves.

I know... "ewwww", "ick!", and "Holy Crap - have my kids been anywhere near those filthy children?!?" and especially "oh please, let her not have posted pictures of those!"

Now, because I paid attention in health class - and because I saw the Arthur episode where Muffy gets lice - I KNOW that lice is not the "dirty disease" that it was believed to be... I KNOW this in my brain, but knowledge possessed in my brain does not always translate to emotional well being as I make phone call after phone call to schools, preschool, and even dental office to tell them the lovely news - I am not ashamed to admit now that I was crying many tears of shame then.  It took over a week to wash/boil/spray/throw out/quarantine everything in my house and slightly longer than that to be mentally prepared to be humorous about the situation!

So, without further Ado, I present:

All I Really Need to Know I Learned From Lice:
Share Everything (except hats, combs, jackets, barbies... yeah, never mind - be selfish, it's safer that way) *  Play Fair - and at least 5 feet from the nearest child * Don't hit people, especially when they might wrestle you down to a questionably clean rug that hasn't been disinfected yet * Put things back where you found them, after mom has finished tumbling them in the dryer on HOT for 20 minutesDon't take things that aren't yours, especially combs and hats! * Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody, because nobody likes having their hair pulled even if it is very necessary to remove every last nit * Wash your hands before you eat - and as often as possible, especially is you touch your sisters/daughters hair * Flush - wait, I didn't learn that last week... but it's still important! * Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you - and a good break from stress * Live a balanced life - take breaks each hour from hair searching * Take a nap every afternoon, because you probably haven't slept at night while doing all this darn laundry * When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together - and keep your hair tied into tight little bands so as not to share anything unpleasant * Be aware of wonder.  Life can exist in a tiny seed - or a tiny egg that should be removed and destroyed thoroughly * Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die, and so do lice... they're just harder to kill * and then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.  Look VERY closely until your eyeballs are ready to pop out!   (with apologies to Robert Fulghum)

I also learned that good friends are good to have and "I've been there" are nice words to hear sometimes! * there is a lot of fabric in cars... whether you drive a Yugo or a Mercedes - those stupid seatbelts never end!  * no matter how tired you are you should still separate your laundry carefully because even though the 9 year old thinks his new pink splotchy polo is cool it screams "my mom can't do laundry" to the rest of the world! * Dolls and Barbies really don't need changes of clothes! * Who needs so many stuffed animals? * Attachment to physical possessions (bows, hairbows, etc...) is evil * Cheap rugs are cheap for a reason and don't necessarily like to be thrown in the washing machine * Tenacity is a good quality, except in tiny little bugs * Staying fit is important in case you ever need to bend to do laundry for 20 hours straight!

On a lighter note, the girls had REALLY cute hair do's for 10 days straight... 
and the bedrooms were REALLY REALLY clean when all was said and done!

(with special thanks to the teachers and principal at my daughter's school for their subtlety - she came home BEAMING because Mrs. T loved her hairdo's... even though Mom suspects there was some other reason for taking a glance at her head!)


24 comments:

Wep said...

Now I'm all itchy :(

Becky said...

I've never laughed so hard about lice before! I'm really hoping I remember this post if my little rugrats ever get it. :)

cold cocoa said...

I'm glad you got over this quick! I like the list. I imagine you will be looking at your kids' heads quite closely the next few months.

Sidenote: I didn't know you guys had the same play kitchen as us!

Megz said...

Funny. I just had the lice conversation a few days ago. We had it growing up and so I thought everyone else had it too. Guess not since I got lots of surprised looks.
Sorry you had to test out all the products but maybe it's nice to know an expert is in the fam if it arises anywhere else. Really cool H hair, btw. And my scalp is itching as well now.

T said...

you should have seen H's hair when we took out the braids... it was beautiful and wavy... and unfortunately we had to comb it through and put it right back in braids again :(

LC said...

No fun...but I loved the colorful post. It could make a great handout for schoolkids everywhere or a fun and educational kids book.
Speaking of books now would be a good time to re-read Pollyanna. What would she would say? "I'm so glad I have such an efficient washer/dryer to do all this laundry in!" Ha ha, I know, not even funny.

christie said...

Holy cow...now I'm all itchy. I can't even hear the word lice without starting to itch. Weird.
I must admit, your daughter's hair looks amazing!

Heather B said...

That's the nice thing about having boys; if the lice issue ever comes up, buzz cuts are totally acceptable. With my limited hair skills, Abby would be in BIG trouble...

Good job, mom. You did great.

Mrs de Miranda said...

Even though its not the same, my dog just went through fleas, and I felt like you did. EWW. But good job! I felt like I would NEVER get rid of them, but they are finally gone!!

Veggie Mom said...

Oh, we've had those itchy visitors here before, too! I have to agree with your other readers-I get itchy just reading this post!!

jewelstreet said...

Oh. lice visited our house for awhile, and I remember all those things that lice taught me. lol. I scared my daughter by telling her I was going to shave her head the next time she got lice. (They were impossible to get rid of) We have had no more. lol.

I wish I had your braiding talents. The hairdo's are gorgeous.

Now my head itches. I'm going to go shampoo.

Mrs. S said...

cute hair-dos! I love the design of your blog. Oh your kiddos are precious. Thanks for stopping by yesterday!

Casey's trio said...

Thanks for stopping by our blog and saying hello during the SITS-fest! I love how you found the bright side in this stressful situation...Cutie-pie hairdos and clean rooms:)

Jen Sue Wild said...

Thanks for your sweet words today onmy blog.

Oh this would have stressed me out too. My kids have never had lice but I did when I was 12 and liveing in Hawii I rember sitting for hours as my mom combed my hair takeing out all the little nits it was awful. My mom never let me sleep over at anyones house again.

I think you handeled this very well.

Celine said...

Ouch lice! Gotta hate those! :(

My First Kitchen said...

I'm going to have fake itching all day now. :) I guess neither of our green bag mojo worked during the Blogathon. Thanks for rooting for me though. :)

Firefly said...

Wow T, you got more comments on lice than I would have imagined! ha. I feel your pain on this one. It seems lice live in the classrooms of K-3 grade, and last year my youngest ended up with them. All the moms were embarrassed and wouldn't admit their girls had them. I started calling around like a detective and discovered that the ENTIRE third grade had them. ha.ha. One kid whose parents don't pay any attention can cause a whole lot of trouble for everyone else! Let's just say the mom's were "PO'd" but we all did have very clean houses in the end. UUmmm, my favorite part was my husband checking me for lice... I felt like a monkey.

T said...

yeah - Monkey feelings all around... I REALLY need a haircut and am afraid to go until I have him check one more time - I can't imagine the embarrassment if I get there and she has to send me home with my hair half cut because there's something in it (really - there isn't, but this is the kind of awful nightmares I'm having still!)

Chelsi said...

So, you don't really need any more comments, but my head is, also, itchy. :o) And, I have been there. Not as a parent, but as the child. Congrats on getting past the embarrassment quickly and sharing your humor with the rest of us!

Sher said...

Ug. I'm sorry. My Mom had them when she was in school -- passed on by someone in her class -- and she still remembers the trauma. Good job on working your way through it. I am trying not to itch in sympathy.

Melodie said...

I have BTDT, too. I literally went through my daughter's hair strand by strand to make sure I got everything out of there.

DJane said...

I totally stress and get freaked out over things like that too. It doesn't matter if there are 'worse' things in life, this was not pleasant, I'm sure. Good job on all the hard work and the kids' hair looked adorable, wish I could braid like that.

Anna Lefler said...

I love your blog! Thanks for stopping by on blogathon day...hope to see you around again soon...

Take care and have a great weekend...

:^) Anna

One Cluttered Brain said...

so if I want some comments all i have to do is blog about lice huh?
Ew.
But ode to the cute hair AND clean room..You must have worked your butt off for that...
I'm sure Robert Fulgrum does not mind...