Short Order Chef

This is not about my lack of height - though I'm sure that's LOTS of fun for everyone around me to laugh about.  So go ahead...  I still haven't grown and I still rather enjoy a good short joke.  Be warned though - if you feel it necessary to SHARE your short joke, please be sure it's not the one about being the last to know when it's raining, because that just doesn't make any sense at all!

This is about my kids.

My picky kids.

You see, I have a 15 year old son who has never really enjoyed meat.  or peanut butter.  or beans.  and the list goes on and on.  He now has decided he wants to be a vegetarian.  To be fair, he decided this MANY years ago and we said "no" because neither ManOfTheHouse nor I has any clue as to how to be a healthy vegetarian.  The more I learn - the more impossible this is... but the T-boy is now old enough to cook and therefore (apparently) to figure out his own sources of protein.  Thankfully he is rather fond of milk, cheese, and eggs so I think he'll survive. 

I also have a 13 year old son (W) who thinks that Scurvy is a life choice.  Fruits and Vegetables?  They add color to the plate and he can appreciate that... but the taste doesn't appeal.  He is able to choke down the requisite amount in order to be allowed to leave the table, but only just.  The thing keeping this kid alive is probably his braces - without which I'm pretty sure he would have OD'd on caramel at least a year ago.

And then there's the 10 year old son (Po)...  who has some short term memory loss.  We serve chicken marinara - he groans... We remind him nicely that he rather enjoyed this the last time - he disagrees... repeatedly.  The food grows cold while he rolls his eyes and asks "why do you only know how to cook GROSS food" - but eventually he breaks down and takes a bite.  "oh, THIS?  I like THIS, I was  thinking of that other gross stuff you make" 

Then come the girls - 8 year old (H) is pretty brave - but if something touches her plate that is not to her liking we have tears.  Big.  Crocodile.  Emotional Girl Tears.  I should be grateful that we have passed the phase of "my banana broke and is therefore rendered inedible" but I'm pretty sure this is just as bad. 

6 yr old (M) says she wants to be a "veterinarian" too when she grows up.  She is having a hard time differentiating between the two because they both love animals?  Of course, she loves chicken nuggets more than anything else on earth - so this may not go over well.  Perhaps she can just care for dogs and cats? 

Add to this the fact that I don't eat red meat or chocolate - which are ManOfTheHouse's favorite food groups.  Or perhaps the fact that I could use to slim down a few pounds whereas there are other people in the house who need to be gaining those pounds...

Don't ask me what's for dinner.  I'm thinking we should just buy season passes to a buffet.