Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Columbus proved nothing to me...

Apparently the world is flat.

I know this because I recently fell off the edge.

I know - you wondered what happened to me, well, there you have it, "there be monsters" and all that jazz... I can't confirm or deny the existence of elephants and a hugo-mongous turtle holding it all up, my last pair of contacts got ripped and it's hard to tell the difference between elephants and my laundry pile.

Turns out it's kind of a long way down at the edge, but not entirely impossible to claw your way back up.

Good to know.

If you want a BETTER excuse than that you're welcome to invent one.  Until then, I'm sticking with my flat world theory.

And don't believe anyone who tells you that it's because I'm busy...

They're a bunch of liars...  whose brains are obviously mush from all the museum meetings, youth conferences, party planning, sewing, PTA meetings, laundry, shuttling kids from school to school and back again, field trips, nutrition classes, shopping, planning meetings, church classes, eye appointments, working out, dance classes, scouts, youth group, cooking, cleaning, oil changes, wasting time on Pinterest, hair appointments, helping people move, and trying to just read a darn book before the deadline they've had to do.

Those kind of people just can't be trusted.

Don't worry, today will be devoted to thinking of something hilarious for tomorrow... it's a good bet it will be inspired by an eye appointment, nutrition class or a museum meeting though...


11 comments:

Saimi said...

HA! What does Columbus know anyway?...Obviously he has Nothing on you!

Glad to see you climbed your way back!

Katria said...

Your Discworld reference made me super happy just now. Thank you for that!

Kristina P. said...

I'm just still bitter I had to work yesterday. Don't they care about the earth?

Garden of Egan said...

Falling off the world is OK.
It's quieter over the edge....except for those little voices in your head.

Michelle said...

You fell off for good reasons. That is much better in my book than falling off because you want to disappear. Glad you are busy.

Sher said...

You made it to the eye doctor? Wow, can you see again then? I know you can probably type without seeing well so that doesn't count, but I guess if you're driving I'll assume you can see. Glad you managed to climb back up from the edge.

TisforTonya said...

still not sure I love my new contacts - I had to go with daily wear (stupid dry eyes) and will just break down and wear glasses again (most days at least...) but yeah, safe to drive again so nobody has to worry about my safety (and that of everyone within 80 yards)

Melanie Jacobson said...

I feel this way, too. And every time I've been on the verge of Returning in Triumph Glory this week, something like Kid Vomit happens. So now I'm catching up on blogs at the expense of exercise.

Kazzy said...

I am disappointed in your picture of our flat world, because I would have totally assumed the US of A would be found dead center.

Welcome back.

Jen T said...

Everyone falls off now and then--you wouldn't be normal if you didn't :) Glad you are back!

Charlotte said...

I've been off the edge for a while and haven't seen you here yet. I'll keep an eye out for you.