Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Sometimes the Universe is just Conspiring against me

ManOfTheHouse was out of town last night - setting up a campground for a passel of giggling teenaged girls or other nonsense.  I'm not quite sure...  he could probably get away with a lot sometimes for all the attention I pay to his out of house activities.  Camping?  Bye Honey, have a good time.  Biking?  Bye Honey, have a good time. Business Trip?  Bye Honey, have a good time and bring me something nice.

the box too... I really dig that box

Okay, okay - I do pay more attention than THAT.  I call obsessively, for instance.  Last night he received a text while I stood in line at WalMart... telling him all about the loud alarms that had just filled the store when (I'm assuming) someone tried to smuggle a big screen TV out of the store underneath their tube top.  Then I proceeded to text him about the family ahead of me in line... the pregnant mother currently puking into a trash can while waiting in line.  I quickly found another (longer) line but my morbid curiosity forced me to notice that everyone else stayed in that short line... really, saving 3 minutes is worth that smell?  (Confidential to that poor mother - ummm, honey - next time, rather than having someone hold your hair out of the way - make a beeline for the restroom...  even if they put ALL your groceries back on the shelves and you have to re-shop... still a better place for puking)

M took the opportunity last night to crawl in and sleep in my bed last night.  Normally this is an absolute No-no...  but I caved... mostly because she came to give me a hug and a snuggle when I was reading a book and by the time I was at the end of the chapter she was asleep.  Frankly, she's getting heavy.  (yes, she does still weigh only 35 pounds... and yes that IS rather light for a 6 year old... but no, I still did not want to carry her to bed)

I didn't sleep so well.  (this is where an audio clip of a sharp shocked intake of breath would go nicely... when are blogs going to get audio?)

I debated calling last night and canceling my morning walk/mental health therapy since ManOfTheHouse wouldn't be here... but I have older children and that is what they are for.  Well, that and bringing in the groceries.  For those of you with only younger children - what were you thinking?

When the alarm failed to go off this morning (umm, because I didn't SET the alarm because that is ManOfTheHouse's job and well, I forgot okay!) I freaked a little because I woke up a few minutes late.  Thank goodness for internal alarms.  In a flash (and like the superhero I like to pretend to be when nobody is watching) I ran about the house collecting my walking pants (oh shoot... where are those... forget it, these shorts are only a LITTLE dirty - I'll wash them when I get home) and my socks (actually, those were where they belonged) and my shoes (why oh why must my little girls wear my shoes around the house and leave them in two separate spots?), and bemoaning the fact that I did NOT get the dishes or the laundry or the weeding done yesterday - I went to grab my keys.  My keys... hmmm.   Keys... where are you keys?  Oh forget it, I'll grab the spare set and find mine when I get home (after I wash these shorts) - of course, the spare set is right where they belo...  crap... where did they go???  (Side note - just NOW 3 hours later, I remembered that I knocked them down yesterday while grabbing something else, argh)

The universe was clearly telling me that I needed to stay home this morning - I'm on load two of laundry - the weeds have all been pulled - the dishwasher just finished and is waiting for one of those older children to empty it - and as you just found out... I located the keys... both sets actually!

(update - while waiting for photos to upload - I found out that it was the mail key I knocked down yesterday - If anyone has seen a red clip attached to a big clunky black key, let me know)


T said...

ahhhh, NOW they're found... the first set was missing yesterday when I left for WalMart - so the spares were clipped to my purse strap (so as not to lose them - I'm nothing if not organized)

and Tauna and Serene can shut it RIGHT now because they know first hand how often I lose things...

Garden of Egan said...

Honey YOU KNOW IT!!! The master loser!

I was glad that you got on to the part about losing something, cuz I was getting ready to lose my lunch after reading about your People of Walmart. Really? Must you barf in line. Walmart already does rollbacks, the barfback is way too much.

Megz said...

My awesome prego puking story involved walmart as well. Must be all the people, odors and flat screens being stuffed down tube tops....
I don't think I would have left the line though. I would have been rubbing the poor woman's back, putting a cold Diet Coke on her forehead, offering some words of wisdom on stretch marks....but that's just the kind of person I am.

Lisa said...

Oh. my. goodness. PUKING IN THE WALMART LINE? That is the best story I've ever heard! I can't believe you weren't laughing hysterically and collapsing in a puddle behind her. Glad you found the keys...and got your laundry done...and filled the dishwasher. I'm currently ignoring my filthy home situation and going shopping. I have to. It's the law.

Holly said...

WOW!! I think that beats me passing out in line at Winegar's when I went to pay and was prego with #3!! LOL! At least that didn't STINK! ;p

Well, you sure got ambitious and got things accomplished for the Universe conspiring against you. ;D

Hope the rest of your day goes SMOOTH!

Heather B said...

Man, just when I was missing Walmart...we don't have those over here, but right now, that's fine with me!

ps--glad you found the keys!

Jen T said...

What a memorable Wal-mart experience~ugh! Glad you found the keys. Maybe you should get a 2nd spare set? :) That is what I need!